Diary Session: How have you been?

How have you been Ifedolapo?

I’m okay.

But if you really ask me, I’d say:

Lately I have struggled with anxiety. Anxiety capable of crippling my productivity.

The past few weeks I have experienced an increasing urge to scurry into a hole where no one will have access to me. One I could come out of when I’m ready to face the world again. But we live in a fast paced world that requires me to keep up. So what I have been doing so far is to just keep showing until I just can't.

In that, I find that I've expanded the existing limit I've placed on myself but at each of those instances I risk breaking, myself, surpassing my elastic limit.

When I say the only reason I've been able to make it this far in one piece is based on the goodness of God some might think it cliche to say in times like this. But that is the plain truth because if God hasn't been showing and shining through me, only Him knows where I will be right now.

That's it for now.

How have you been?

Ifedolapo

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My Friend

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In almost a whisper Out of desperation She uttered “Please come by the apartment tonight” "I’ll wait by the window to let you in" He looked straight into her eyes Said nothing in affirmative And walked away With part of her heart in his pocket. The rest of the day went by in a blur Like the light of the sun that gives sight has been snuffed out of day and given to the night. As the night was the only thing she could see And Look forward to. Night came So did her anxiety With full force. Paces back and forth Hour after hour Time was ticking but not fast enough Sighs upon sighs She seats on the window pane And he’s still not in view Her night as dark as ever. Finally she settles on the White two seater couch And rests her head on its arms As her body was catching up With the tiredness her heart felt. “It’s raining there’s no way He would ride all the way On his bicycle to see me” She said with a sadness of a dejected soul and broken heart. She falls asleep

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